SyahSyah♥

Hey guys ! Happy Teachers' Day to all Yuying teachers and staff as well as the other teachers out there..

today went to skool as per normal..let's story about yestersay and the day previous it..on Sunday , went to JB..buy baju kurung for Hari Raya..Best jgkluh..but then yesterday didn't go to skool..skip skool as very tired lioaa..then txt Erul..he surrender himself..sedih jgk..i was worried the whole day about him..but i am quite proud as he and the people who wa involved had surrendered themselves..so proud of u guys..then at night dpt tau from Fared tat semue dpt bail accept for Erul..i was like WTF and WHY..then Fared say tat bcoz of Erul punye kaki..then he say tat die lps but police kene escort gy hospital..happy tat Erul finally kluar and bley lpk ngn drng balek..but , but , but , they are on bail..kes blm selesai lgy..niey susah as they kene trn naek court..i don't want loose them luhh..haiss...

ltr going to Johor with Su and my mummy..haha..i blm mandi lgy..nk basahkn rambut..haha..kkayluh..nk go mandi..bye !

-syahsyah sweetipie

p/s : I really miss lpking with Erul semue !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

11:22 AM

heyhey..it's early in the morning , i am sleepy but can't sleep..-.-

haha! yesterday went to T3...planned to go Johor..but because of the time and my nenek which no ones wants to look after as they all want go Johor also , we planned to stay in Singapore and just buke luar..first2 planned to go ECP..let my Dina lpkn her gian playing her skuter..but then it was 5+ going to 6...so my mum planned go to Changi Airport T3 to walk around and buke..at 6.30 , we search for a place to buke..and guessed wat ? all the placed are full..mood tros tukar..then we decided to go to Simpang Bedok as it's alrdy buke time and there's no more place at tat whole Changi Airport..otw back to T3 , the YOG atheletes from Austria are going back home..then i spotted one of this mat salih guy..he kept looking at me and i kept looking at him..first2 ingt nk senyum..but taaaak naaaak luhh ! haha..then at last he smiled at me in a flirty way..so i smiled back and told everyone about it..hahaha ! semangat pe syah ..then went to Simpang Bedok..there get to eat..haha..ate alot eventually..then dessert time ! tried something new..nice taaw...haha..don't want share wats tat dessert..pandai2 cari tau ye ? haha..ltr i wanna go shower and siap2..my mum says at 8 , semue dh nk kene siap and dh bley kluar..my leg got blister siaaa..ltr wanna POP it..haha..so can wear shoes..haha ! kkayluh..nothing to update..ouh ! the pic above was taken on Friday..Bazaaar time ! haahaa..from the left , thoe guys sitting are , Hasif Nitro , Afai RX-Z , their friend which i don't knw his name and Acap..those standing are , syahsyah , Mir and Su..haha..syahsyah nak aje menyelit..haha..kkay luh..bye2 !

-syahsyah sweetiepie

p/s : Wanna be in love with a mat salih in future .

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

6:15 AM

hey guys..just came back from bazar..had a great day..

just now went to skool..went home straight after tat..plan to take a nap..reached home at about 1+..check FB and twitter then went to sleep..tired siaa..then Fared Bear called me..he ajak lpk..so i mandi and siap2..45 minutes siaa..haha..drng bising..then found out from Su and Mir tat Acap pun nk join..ALAMAK !!dh luhh i hate him..then they expect me to see his face..sooot je ! mcm nk cancel je and follow Nyza semue..but then pk2 balek , just go aje..at 5+ , headed to Geylang..met Su at Paya Lebar MRT..then we go to Sing Post to buke at LJS..reserved seat and order our food o tak pack ltr..then Mir and Acap dtng..trus i soot !tk bbl with him langung..just diam2 je..then Su try to make me talk to him..so talk gytu2 je..tk ikhlas luhh..haha! then saw Nyza and Syafiq masuk Pastamania..went there and saw Cikgu Syazwani..salam her and talk2 jap..then went back to LJS pasal dh buke..haha.mkn semue..then saw Arief , Aziq and Ayuz..Ayuz wave at me..so i wave back..Aziq sombong gylerr...hmph ! after eating , went to Pastamania to say bye2..planned to join them after eating..then i say to Nyza , just calling2 me je..after tat went to lpk2 outside and jalan2 at Bazaar..when dh pnt , we lpk2 at Eunos Road 5 sane..we lpk2..then Afai RX-Z called..he tanye kite kt mane..then i ckp luhh where were we..soon enough , Afai RX-Z dtng with his friends which i only knew 2..Abid and Hasif NItro..then we lpk2..amek gmbr semue..after tat we jalan2 at Bazaar lgy..then we slack2 belakang Bazar sane..i belanje Afai RX-Z semue burger..janji Afai RX-Z je..haha..but the ret pun nk..so just beli luh with Afai RX-Z..then planned buy something..so me and Su ikot Afai RX-Z and Hin tk slh..haha..we sesat 3 kali sehy..haha..at last sampai jgk..then we lek2 jap..i ask Hasif Nitro if can tumpang balek..but no helmet..lupe nk suroh drng bwk extra helmet..haha..but at last i take cab..haha..Su bingit dgn Acap coz he tetap nk naek satu cab with her..so i asked her to bersbr..wat to do kn..i reached home at 11+..now nk tron lpk jap..

haha..kayluh untill here..bye2!

-syahsyah sweetiepie

p/s : I want my Dendeng still !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

11:51 PM

I wish i could still be like this baby..just strting to knw about life , about the world and most importantly the meaning of "LOVE" ..if i cld turn back time , i would like to be like this baby..still growing and still am small..this baby doesn't knw and experience anything..but as he grows , he will go through everything like wat we've teenagers gone through..but he is still small and fragile..he still yet need to learn every single thing..he needs to strt from the strt..haiisss..i just miss the times when i used to be like tat baby..now my life really means nothing..i've lost everything accept for Su and S.H.A.S..i've lost my one and only A's which is also my CINTAs..they mean alot to me..but then they're gone now..i just really missed them..i missed Andy and Yan the most..they're my everything..Acap?idk luhh..i missed him too..but then i force my self not to missed him..all i knw now is tat i am trying to move on from all of this..i am trying slowly..i want to be like tat baby..i want to strt a new like this baby..i want to learn everything from the strt..i want to be like the baby..

-syahsyah sweetiepie

p/s : i want be a baby !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

10:04 PM

heyloo guys..

yesterday night i met up with Afai RX-Z..paisey sehy..all this time i thought his name was Apai..but it was Afai..haha..yesterday he msg me..he asked if want to lpk with him..i say where..then he say he meet me at my block..so i okaay luh..when he txt me , i went down..paisey jgk luhhh..ahaha..but then we talk normally..then we move to Acik's block..he say ramai orng jalan my block and bising..so he terpakse tolak his bike to Acik's block..i help him bwk his helmet..like mataey luh sehy..haha..we lpk2 at Acik's block..bnyk story..haha..lie mataey tgh dating gytu..taknak luh mataey ! haha ! at least get to knw him abit better..then at 10 , i went home.. kesian sehy die..he from camp sanggop balek then meet me straight..but skjap je..haha..he reached my block sepantas kilat luhh sehyy..haha..at home just txted Fared Bear..haha..Su bangga Acik panggil die baby..pasangan pembawa virus luhh drng..WTH btol kn?haha..

today , balek siang from skool..txt Erul..ask him lpk wat time..he say he lpk at 3..so i went home and sleep for a while..then he txted me..he complaint he alone..kesiannye die..so i wash my face and went down..saw Fared Bear..so we three lpk2 jap..siaal je Fared Bear kate die kacau us berasmaradana..-.-

then Fared Bear need to go to skool..so left me and Erul alone..Saaaaaap ! mendaq sesion strted..kite malu2 , segan and silu siaaaa...haha..when i diam , he also diam..then buka topik motor..Erul axcited he soon dpt enrol lesen motor..terpakse luhh lyn angan2 die..he say motor die motor KR..wow ! cool kepe..colour pun cantek sehyy..haha..Erul , nnti dh dpt lesen , bwk me jalan2 ye?haha...siang2 dh plan..then Pipit dtng..kene kacau lagy..sungguh irits..haha !then they both bbl pasal ape entah..i sit there ade bnyk big question marks on top of my head..haha..then at 6 went home..kene beli barang2 buke luhh sehyy..haha..today puase full..at last..naseb tk dihasut setan2 bwh blok..haha..when tgh buke , ibu came with Asyiqin..die nanges2..she say Zul and Amirul lari rumah..WTF ?! niey semue uncle Arshad punye pasal luh..dh pukul anak , die halau pulak..kesian bdak2 tu..tgh puase luhh..tpi lucky Amirul came my hse at last..tkya cari..hahaa...

sumpah tgh mendaq now..haha..nothing to post lgy..amcm i kacau2 si Su and Acik? nak? haha..sudah semestinye..haha..harap2 Su and Acik std luhh..dh strt panggil "Baby"...haha..sungguh menyampah..dh luh due2 pembawa virus..sungguh irits..haha..naseb pakai mask..this is supaye tk jangkit..haha..dh luhh..tknk kacau couple pembawa virus nieyy...diaaaam je syah ! haha !..kayluh..bye2 !

-syahsyah sweetiepie

p/s : Pembawa Virus ! Jage2 !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

7:41 PM

lawa tak gmbr?haha..time tgh boring and nothing better to do , so we took pics aje luh kn..dh lame tk amek gmbr with Erul !haha..at last dpt jgk..the funny thing is Pipit..selame niey tk pena2 tegur or wat..then suddenly cn become close frens..class gytu..haha..when i think about it again , i really miss A's..but i am not part of them anymore..so Erul , Pipit , Aciik and the rest of their gang luh tmpt me lpk..Su pun dh join drng..let the reasons be to herself je kn..haha..now me and Su dh nekad no more love..we promise tat selagy lelaki kt dunia niey cnnt hargai pmpn , selgy tu we wont hargai drng..simple kn?haha..tapi skrng niey , tgh tunggu Su ngn Erul..si Erul niey tido mati luhhh !! txt pun tk reply..nnti semue dh tron , die je yng tron lmbt...apadaaa !! haha..for those of u yng think tat i dh ade pengganti A's semue , please stop tat thoughts..A's can't never be replaced..they will always be in my heart..i am with Erul's gang pun pasal i wanna try to forget them..i am trying as tat is wat they want..haiss...

now syahsyah tknak sadsad..me wanna be happy and crazy like Erul si tukang jahit ! haha..Wth?!Erul tulis kt blog die ckp me complainer gytu..sedih sehyy...bustard sehyy Erul..haha..but,but,he appreciate me and Su...Awwwww ! swit gytu ! haha..dh luh..

dnt knw wat to do..i wanna siap2 then mit Su... Bye !

- Syahsyah sweetiepie

p/s : No more love !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

1:58 PM

LIES , LIES AND LIES ALL OVER AGAIN !!! ARGHHHHH ! why must it be so hard for u to understand uh Acap ? u think by lying to me , i will be okaay ? by making me putting high hopes for u , u think i won't be hurt ? i've trust u soo much..and wat is this ? u lied to my face again..i am trying not to be rude..but do u deserve this kindness from me? no u don't..for a guy like u , u don't deserve my kindness..i hate u soooo much now..after wat i heard , i have forgotten my love towards u..i just hate u soooo damn f-ucking much !! ARGHHHHH !!! as for u guys in A's , i am sorry if i have to leave u guys..the reason for my "flirting" perangai is just to forget my love towards Acap and to hurt him..but now i've realised..wats the point of me doing this?he doesn't feel anything..i'm really sorry guys..but i don't wanna hurt u guys anymore..i don't want to be ignored and hate by u guys..so this is why i leave u guys..sorry kalau syah menyusahkn hidup korng..after this , i won't be a burden to u guys..i will love u guys always..kalau sudi nk berbaek2 dgn syah , just txt me..i am still looking foward for our friendship to be back..i just love u guys so much..skrng Mir , Su and Syah akan bina hidup baru tanpa u guys..it will be hard for us to forget u guys..but we have too..

-syahsyah ur love

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

7:16 PM

"Tiada puisi atau lagu .

Tiada potret tiada ragu .

Yang dapat ku ilham seindahmu .

Nyata kau satu dalam berjuta .

Wahai jejaka kau istemewa .

Walau ku kembara sedunia .

Walau ku temui ramai jejaka .

Nyata kau tiada tandingannya .

Seikhlas hati aku menyinta .

Kau istemewa , teristemewa .

Daku berikrar wahai puteraku .

Bina mahligai syahdu .

Hanya engkau dan aku di situ .

Tiada mimpi atau fantasi .

Tiada rasa lebih berseri .

Semekar murni hatimu sayang .

Siang dan malam aku terbayang .

Kau istemewa buatku tenang .

Istemewa siang malamku terbayang .

Daku beikrar wahai puteraku .

Bina mahligai syahdu .

Kita berbulan madu di situ .

Ingin ku bawa kau ke awana .

Ingin bermadu kasih asmara .

Sepanjang hayatku curahkan cinta .

Sebenar-benar ucapan kata .

Kau istemewa oh , percayalah .

Ku perlu cintamu nan istemewa . "

this is for u Acap .

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

3:10 AM

we've make our decision..but is it the right decision for u?i don't want u to make the wrong decision again..if u truely love me , i am willingly to accept u back..i was so shocked tat we have tat conversation this morning..i thought u've forget all of our memories..but i am wrong..u in fact remembered..everything the most..the time u asked me to be urs..u even remembered the time..i've totally forgot about tat..u even remembered wat u gave me on every of our anni..first month u gave me one stalk of rose , second month u gave me two stalk of roses and third month u gave me three stalks of roses..u remembered it clearly and i was soo wrong..ouh gosh , we do mis those times..i also can't believe tat u want us to be like we used to be..am i dreaming or am i just imaganing stuffs?i just don't knw..it's too good to be true..the words u said this morning really makes me cry a thousand of tears..are u sure of those words?are u sure tat u still love me and u've just realised it now?are u sure to be back with me one day?are soo sure?it's not tat i don't believe u..but i just don't want u to force urself in doing this..wat i post in my blog is wat i feel..not to make u feel guilty and to love me back..if wat u say are true and u are soo sure about it , i am soo glad..our decisions are made..like wat i've said , i will still love u and wait for u..and u too say the same thing tat u will love me and wait for the rite time..at last i dh dgr kate putus dari u..i feel relief..i am glad tat i am still waiting for u..this time if we are together , i promise u tat wat happened in the past won't happened again..this time my love is only for u Mohd Asyraf..no one else can snatch this love away..only death do us apart..i love u soo much Mohd Asyraf and hope u will to..

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

12:06 AM

Suhada , my bestfriend and will always be..thnk Su for always staying by my side..we've known each other for almost 3 months..ince i've known u , i never think tat we can be this closed..and yet we still are even we fought..u're everything to me too..even if u're the caused of me and Acap broke up , but still , it's not ur fought dear..i've always love u and i won't stop doing tat untill i closed my eyes..ur love is soo strong to Yan..and i hope u guys will be back one day..i will make u guys be happy together again..i never slh kn u even if u are at fault..i am sorry to say this but i used to hate u..but my love is just so strong towards u..i just can't hate u dear..i just don't knw why..u've always gave me the strength to keep on living and trying..i want to see u happy..tats all..ur happiness is mine..and will always be..Su , don't ever leave me..now , u are my life too..u're just tat one special girl which i can't afford to loose..u're like the other half of me..if u're a guy , i think i will want to be with u..but u're a girl..haha..if u think by making the decision to leave me is the right thing , then u're wrong dear..if u leave , i will leave too..but this time forever..u knw wat i mean..so Su , thnks for loving me and always be by my side through thick and thins..i will always love u Ros Suhada !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

11:37 PM

Happy 7 Months Tak Menjadi Acap !

today is the 19..if some of u knw wat happens on the 19 , i think u will be glad..to Acap , since the day we are together , u've lighten my days..we've gone through every ups and down throughout our first 3 months together..but then it stopped there..we broke up for some reasons..this year valentine's day , u brought happiness in me..i just gave u a card which was hand-made and brought Rauzan down for u..but in return , u've suprised me by singing the song "Mimpi Indah" and gave me a flower with a teddy bear..u really make me cry..ur kiss was the most wonderful present on tat day..and i am really happy..this year on my birthday , u've make me happy as u knw it's the date of my traumatic past..but yet , u make me happy and glad to have u as my darling..u're the first guy who gave me flowers on my birthday..i really appreciate tat alot..i really had the most wonderful birthday with u..one my birthday party , u stayed for the whole party..u slept throughout the two nights..i am really glad to have u as my boyfriend..i am glad tat my family likes u alot..u are really closed to them and u've made my sisters and cousin to accept u..u're the guy i've always been searching..but all of tat doesn't stay..after we broke up , i've known i've hurt u alot..i've move on faster then u..i knw i shl not have done tat..i am so sorry for tat..but after 1 month , i am closed with u again..we were soo closed tat people still thinks we are together..u still treat me like u always do..u've really make me happy even if tat time i have him..after i broke up with him , i was hoping to get back with u as he doesn't want me again..i want u back as i really love u and i knw tat u love me..i've remembered tat day when i wish u happy 6 months..u were in the hospital..i wa there beside u everytime to entertain u..but then , after u know her , things changed..ur love changed too..we've patch back for a while then u left again..this time by hurting me badly..i still can't forgive u..but yet i still be ur friend..i hope u will remember this date like i will always do..i just wanna say , thnks for this 7 months..thnks for being there with me even if it hurts me..thnks Acap..

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

11:15 PM

heyloo guys..just came back..penat sehy..

today no skool as got e-learning..woke up at 12..haha..tk buat e-learning..mampos babe !haha...today i puase..haha..best sehy..haha..one the comp..chat with Su dear and Aziq..tibe2..haha..after tat plan with her to buke luar..then we planned buke at Geylang..so i agree..then Andy call..suroh lpk..i siap2 then went out to mit Andy..saw Acap and Ari..so lpk2 jap..then at 4.30 , went to CP..Erul trn wrong timing sehyy..when i want jalan,he come..haha..Ari gave me a ride to CP..naek basikal..haha..then took the train and meet Su at Bishan..there saw Sakinah..my bestfriend from pri skool..haha..we reached Payar Lebar and then walk2 around..at around 6 , we cari tmpt mkn for buke..naseb tk pack at tat time..so we sit around at take pics..then at around 6.45 , order our food..tkot pack ltr..then it's true..haha..kite tgk mknan tu btol2 menguji kesbran..haha..then got mats2 there..we buat bdh je..haha..after buke , kite jalan2 jap then tron Sengkang..bile tron 297 , saw Abng An..he cpt2 sembunyi bwh meja..then i so called nk cari gadoh..lps slm die , i hugged him..miss him lots..haha..lpk2 and then when home..antar Su at CP then head home..pnt jgk..now just online and uploading pics..haha..kkayluh..i wanna post something special to two people..just wait and see..

-syahsyah ur love

p/s : Hanya ingin kau tahu .

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

11:00 PM

haisss...kini semuenye tinggal kenangan..it's impossible for me to get ur love anymore..i'm giving up on u..whenever i want to try , there's a voice saying , "Are sure u want him?Are sure u won't get hurt if u are with him again?He's not the guy tat u used to knw anymore."the voice keeps telling me this same thing whenever i think of getting u back..shld i or shld i not?i just don't knw..serious..having u around me now makes me feel like dying and crying..i feel akward with u now..not like last time..last time , we were so much like a couple even after we broke up..but now we are just like frenemies..u don't knw tat i still keep the flowers u gave me on my bday..it's been months..the flowers even are rotten..i always keep saying these to the flowers "walaupun kau telah layu , tetapi cintaku kepada Acap tidak akan pernah layu."everyday , i will see the flowers and keep on saying tat..hoping tat the flowers will bloom again like my love..but it just can't..the bear u gave me on valentine's day , i still keep it..nothing about u i throw away..ur pictures , ur gifts and ur love..but u have burnt my pictures..i am hurt by tat..i knw i used to hurt u..but i realised wat i did..but why mut u hurt me this bad?haiss...i jut want the u back..i miss him alot..i miss the u tat u ueed to be..i keep telling myself tat u are the one..but my heart just hurt badly whenever i say tat..why must it be hard for me?why?tell me please..words don't hurt this bad..but action do..ur action do hurt me badly..now , i just can't accept anyone yet..even if i accept , i don't do it bcoz i love him..but i do it bcoz i want to forget u..forget my love towards u..i will never throw away all of our memories..i've locked it inside my heart..it's much safer there..i will never burnt it down like wat u did to my pictures..my picture which symbolised my love towards u..haiss..i must forget u as it's totally impossible for me to have ur love again..it's really impossible..i am really sorry tat i can't forgive u..why?it's bcoz of ur doings and u never want to try..try to make me forgive u..u move on soooo fast..much faster than me..i'm really sorry but i have to forget u now..i've knw everything in ur heart..and i just want u to be happy and i want to have a happy life..will u get back with me one day in future?will u if i keep this feeling of love?if ur answer is yes , than i will keep it until u want me back and love me like u used to..

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

10:11 PM

hello guys..currently am chatting with Erul..haha..stop it luhh Erul..haha..we joke2 arnd..sungguh the merepek..dgn die punye "Buat Ape"..haha..i am alo listening to this song titled "Selamat Tinggal Goodbye"...nice song..i suddenly remembered tat Aciik pena nyanyi this song when lpk at 142..haha..nice song..love it so much..haha..this song khas for guys who maen kayu tiga ye..haha..Erul just now tanye2 me soalan yng tak perlu..haha..malu doookk ! only i knw the ans..hehe...tknk story lebih2..nnti tk pasal2 jdi gossip terhangat...WOW ! tknk luhh...haha..now sumpah tgh mendaq..feel like sleeping , but not tired..still feel like chatting..naseb Erul online..if not mendaq gyler..Cfem ! haha..tdi i otp with "T" jap..haha..he majok ngn me pasal tk tron..he said he was waiting for me..rase berslh pulak..but memang i cannot trn..wat to do kn..mummy say i must stay at home and solat..naseb solat..haha..tenang sikit rasenye..haha..kayluh..nothing more to talk kt blog..haha..enjoy the song !

-syahsyah ur love

p/s : Cair luh dgn die !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

12:22 AM

see them both?sweet couple kn?haiiisss...i don't knw wat to say anymore..i jut can't stop my heart from being jeles and hate them both..i don't mind if they want to date or watsoever..but,please don't do it in front of me..please..i'm begging u guys..i may look okay on the outside..but in the inside?no one knws..only Allah knws how i feel..i feel like crying everytime seeing u guys romancing..but i just smile..this is so i won't cry in front of u guys..it was lucky tat Erul and geng was there everytime u guys are romancing..my other CINTAs was also there..if not,i don't knw wat will happened..i think i would cry and be crazy..eventhough "T" is asking my to be his stdy , i am not rdy as i still love Acap..i am still hurt by his doings..i hated him sooo much bcoz of tat..i want to forget Acap..but not this way..my forcing myself to love "T"..i am doing all this to forget all about Acap..all the things about him..but i can't..i'm sorry Su and Acap..i am really sorry..as wat i said just now , i am strting to have feelings for "E"..but if i can't be with him , then maybe i will be with "T"..i will try to love him..i won't want to hurt any of them..or any of the guys..i just need time..i knw tat u both aren't together yet..but i knw tat one day u guys will..and when tat day come , i will just smile even if i am hurt seeing u guys romancing in front of me..just wanna say thnks to u both for hurting me slowly again..hoepe u guys are happy in future together..

- syahsyah ur love

p/s : I'm hurt !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

6:43 PM

three weeks more to hari raya..hmm...i miss the moment when i used to celebrate with all of my family..the first Raye i had in sengkang with my dad,mum,sisters and abng Yayan..not to forget my other family members..miss tat time..this year , my dad would not be here to celebrate Raye with..how i miss the moment..i knw i will always have my uncles with me..but they are different from my dad..my own dad..haisss...i miss him alot..he is always there when i need him..but now?it's been soo long since i celebrated Raye with my dad..i want to kiss his hand to ask for forgiveness..i want to kiss his cheeck..i want to hug him..i want to cry together with him..whenever he called during Raye , i will cry..my tears will keep on rolling..i can't take this anymore..i need him..only him...i need my ABAH ! my one and only dad..i can't bear to ask for forgiveness through the phone..i can't see his sincerity.. i want to see his tears..i miss his tears..i want to cry together with him..i just want to be with him every Raye..i don't want anything else..i jut want him and my family..i want us to be together like we used to be..happy family..this year , i have everything..my friends , my CINTAs , my family and my love oness..but i don't have my Abah..i just want him..i have to be far away from wat i have this Raye , i will do it..as long as i have my Abah..as long as i can celebrate Raye with him..i miss him...sumpah i do ! i just want him right now..only he cld mend my broken heart..he's one of the reasone i still am strong..everytime i am hurt bcoz of guys , he will cheer me up..he will say to me , "kak , life isn't about guys . If he is not for u , u might find someone better in future . Concerntrate on ur studies . I am sure u will find someone better . " I miss those word..and i really need one now..i wih i cld tell him tat i am sooo hurt now..i want him to councel me..he's the only one who can do tat..only u Abah ! please come back soon..i really miss and need u...

-syahsyah ur love

p/s : i love u , Abah !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

8:03 PM

wat a dream..why must he appeared in it?why not any other guy?i seriously can't stop this feeling..the feeling of love towards him..URGHHHH !! i really want him back in my life..but i knw i can't..i'm trying my best to hate him..but still i can't..i fight with him , quarell with him so tat the feeling of hatred will come..but no..i can't hate him..why?!everyday i noticed he's trying to get her..i am trying to help by supporting him..but wat am i doing?hurting myself again?i am hurting myself now by all those words..this is so i won't feel any pain in future if he really does want to hurt me again..i need someone else to replace him..to at least make me forgot my love towards him..i am not moving on..but i am trying..i just can't move on and find a new guy..i am tooo hurt a wat i said..my life now isn't tat happy..it's all bcoz of my love towards u..every time i see his face , i am trying to tell myself " Syah !He's the guy u hated most !"..but i can't..i've tried..but i can't..i seriously can't..please kill me ! i just can't stand this anymore ! i just can't see them anymore ! even if i try to hate him.. i need omeone to help me..help me to get rid of this stupid love..the STUPID love towards him..i hate this ! i hate wat is happening to me..i just can't..I CAN'T !!!!!!

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

12:22 PM

heyloo..i am ssooo tiredd siaa..

today woke up at 10+.then called Ari..die ajak lpk..just woke up sehyy..then i just agree..i say to them i tk sempat mandi..so they say okay..when went down , saw Yan and Andy too..haha...lpk2..then felt hungry..semue tk puase kt sane..so me and yan beli mkn at mall..senyap2 luhh..haha..then continue lpk and eat..then tibe2 Apai RX-Z msg..haha..pakai hp Yan and reply..skali dpt tau he got girlfren..ALAMAK ! terlps luhh pulak..haha..FAKE ! hope he last long with hi girl..after tat at and 12+ , went home..called Su..she wants to lpk..i okay je..then Acap call my hse..he at 142..i say to him msg Su..i tgh mls nk trn sehy..then after a long time ,Su bising..suroh trn..i tron luhh..before tron , mandi luh of coz..biler tron , saw Aciik and Erul..haha ! they look at me mcm tk pena nmpk orng ! ape nieeyy ! haha..then mase lpk tu , i tgh mendaq gyler..so kacau2 Erul and Aciik..then Su gy txt Aciik wat i say about Erul..niey yng mendtng kn kemarhan orng nieyy..issshhhkkk !!

after tat i kacau2 Acap..bingit siaak ngn die...Akim then dtng...ouh Akim , i miss u sooo much luhh..haha...then lpk2..tibe2 my sis msg..suroh temankn die gy CP..i ikot kn aje..after buying her stuff , continue lpk2 ngn drng..after tat Akim balek..then my turn..i then call Su suroh temankn me buy pineapple..dh beli semue , she continue lpk ngn Acap while i balek...today sedare-mare semue dtng nk buke..then saw ibu nye family..buat bodoh then the rest sampai..after buke , duduk2 luar..then masuk bilik with Haryz and Danial..we lpk2 and gurau2..then kluar balek ,tgk tv..then took pics at webcam..then they all balek..haha...

so currently now i tgh chat with my new fren Anjer and Erul..haha..mendaq..kayluh..tats all i have..bye !

- syahsyah ur love

p/s : I want to forget u !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

11:44 PM

OUHHHHH NOOOOOOO !!!! Tomok is getting married nxt year ?! Mane bleyy !!UWAAAAA !!!! He's mine !! sape niey yang brani2 rampas die nieyy ?! Cpt mengaku !! EEEEEEEEE Gramnyyeee !! kite dh lame bercinta then senang2 je nk kahwin ngn Tomok..mane bleyy ! he's mine forever and alwaes taw...langkah mayat aku dulu seblm nk kahwin dgn die..

Tomok bby pun satu..mane bleyy u kahwin dgn orng laen..pandai2 je ckp this yr last yr puase bujang..mane bleyy..u dh janji nk kahwin ngn i..u TIPUUUU !! i sedih u nk kahwin ngn orng laen..Sakeet HATIII !!!! SAKET SEKALI !! Jangan tinggal kn i TOMOKK !!!

FAKE !!!!

hahaha...so the over luh syah nieyy..haha..prasan je tau..haha..kkay..proper update please syah ! haa..today go to skool as usual..science test sehyy..stress ku dibuatnye..then history lesson , slept for 1 hr...FUUUHHH ! best tu..hahah..after skool went to park..nk jumpe Akim..but he was late..saw adq Era,Ziana and Amirul..so lpk with them jap..then went to 142 to mit dorng2...took the same bus with "Ustaz" Amirul luh konon..haha..bile sampai , saw Acap,Andy and Mir..Andy tanye if i puase tak..i say luhh blm lgy bley..then he mintak me ____...so ape lgy,kite sembunyi2 luhh..haha..after tat Acap amek Su..kite joke2 around..then tibe2,Aciik,Erul and the geng datang..issshhhkk !! ahha...dorng puase yok2..hahaha..aiyoooo ! haha..they stay kt sane quite long jgk luhh..mcm2 lagu drng maen kt guitar..kite pun join sekaki nyanyi..haha..after tat dorng cioaw..so tinggal kite bdak2 A's..Su tibe2 nanges..pasal Yan luh..i ask her to stop..so she did..then we lpk2..soon semue kene balek..so me and Su gy mall..temankn die buke puase..after buke semue,g 142..but i go home dulu..tukar baju..then tron balek..tibe2 Acap dtng..ponteng terawih..ishk3..haha ! Andy,Ari adn Ruzaidil pun same ! ape nk jdi niey..bile tgh lpk2,sempat txt Apai RX-Z..he' 20..haha..terkejot jap..haha...

kkayluh..gtg..nk lpk2 ngn family plak..BYEEE !

- syahsyah ur love

p/s : Jangan tinggal daku !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

10:27 PM

Hey..let me give u a proper update of today..

today went to skool..now dh tkde lmbt lgy..haha.. early je sampai..haha..today got maths and english tet..english was okay..math was abit hard..haiyaaa !!after tat had normal lessons..still i tk puase coz blm bley lgy..hehee..at skool memang bored as no one txted me..sedih pe hidup..haiss..but around 1+ gytu,Su and Acao msg..they sampai alrdy kt 142..haha..so after skool,cabbed back home..the taxi driver so damn iratating..menggatal je taw..isshhhhkk ! benci btol..then reach at 142..Acap was alone..but saw Aciik and the geng..haha !it sebelah Acap then tanye mane Su..he say Su tgh naek lrt..haha..then she call..die kate die dh sampai..so we walk and mit her..die dgn her sis and her sis punye kwn..then we lpk2 at 142...bestt..haha..Su kacau2 kite..get to knw new frens..Acap so the iratating..haha ! then Andy and Mir sampai..lgy luh best..we joke2 around semue..then around 4+,Su,Acap,Ana and Danny kene balek..say bye2 to them..then me and the rest naek my hse jap..nk bgy Andy charger iPod..after tat they balek..so i jut duduk rumah..at 5,i got tution..blaja for tmrw' test..then Amyrawr came..haha..luckily tution dh bes..so bbl2 ngn die...then webcamming ngn Su..we even take ome pics..haha..then she go home..dh nk buke puase time ! haha..i also keypo2 uh..full siaa mkn..then continue to chat with Su..tibe2 Taufiik called..he ajak me tean him go buy something..so i agree..then he waited for me kt bwh blok..then we walk to 124..he go buy tat thing then he antar me home..haha..so sweet of him kn? ahaha...we are just frens ye..nothing more..haha...then now i am just chatting and doing nothing..kap lgy then call Taufiik..haha..tgh bored man..haha..kkayluh..sampai disini sahaja...Bye guys !

- syahsyah ur love

p/s : NO MORE LOVE !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

8:57 PM

i miss this moment..haiss..dh,dh,dh syah..everything is still okay..i think?latest news,Su and Yan broke up alrdy..sape mintak?Yan..WTH kn? tgh bulan puase sehyy..bknnye nk buat orng happy..tpi menyakitkn and menyedihkn hati orng ade luhh...haiss..ape nk jdi sehy..but wat i knw,now i really want us to be happy..A's sampai mati y'all !demi syah plz korng baek2 semula..tkmo gadoh2...i dh give up ngn korng2 nye hal gadoh..cube baek2 semule..mcm syah and Acap..btol tk Acap?tgk tu..Acap pun agree..hahaha..simply just let go of the past and create a new frenship..become like me luhh guys..NO MORE LOVE ! haha..yeah,yeah !!why?hanya Allah ngn myself je tau why..i'm no longer telling anyone why..dh pnt and mls..everyday mesti ade je ppl asking me why this,why tat..issshhhkk !! so strting from now, no more asking yee?let me and Allah share thi wonderfull secret..haha...kayluh..wanna keypoh2 kt luar..they all nk buke..hahah ! nk join sekaki ! tak tau malu uh syah nieyy ! dh luhh tk puase ! hahaa ! kkay luh..bye2 ! to korng2 yng syah cinta , please cheer up and dgr nasihat syah ye? SELAMAT BERBUKE ! (:

-syahsyah ur love

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

6:52 PM

Qeisya , mummy rindu same Qeisya..dh lame mummy tk jengok Qeisya..mummy dpt tau Qeisya saket ye? alalaala...kesian nye die..Qeisya cpt sembuh ye..nnti mummy dtng kite bley maen2..nnti mummy belikan Qeisya something ye kalau Qeisya dh baek..mummy btol2 tk sbr nk jumpe Qeisya..hari2 mummy pk kn Qeisya..mummy sorry kalau mummy dh lame tk jengok Qeisya..mummy busy..mummy skola,mummy ade problem dgn kwn2 mummy and mummy tkde mase..Qeisya tau kn nek su tk kasi mummy dtng umah Qeisya sgt kn..jdi mummy tk bley luh slalu dtng..mummy akan dtng nxt week..mummy janji ye Qeisya?mummy dh tk ley tahan lgy..dh terlalu rindukn Qeisya..satu2nye anak mummy..walaupun Qeisya cume anak angkat mummy,tetap Qeisya anak mummy satu2nye..Qeisya tunggu mummy ye?nnti mummy dtng..kite lpskn rindu ye?Qeisya cpt baek taw..mummy tknk Qeisya saket..mummy nk Qeisya sihat..Qeisya , mummy SAYAANG Qiesya ! MUACKZZZ3 !

To Su : Su,jgn luh sedih2..be happy..i've read ur blog..Su tkde kene mengene dgn ape yng terjdi between me and Acap..semue tu terjdi sebab dh ditentukanNya..i can handle it..so jgn nk slh kn diri Su..jujur syah kate,memang syah kecewa dgn Su and Acap..but then syah cube untuk lupekn and strt anew..and pasal Yan,Su releks je..he will notice wat he did wrong..he will understand u one day..just bersbr..bukan ke sbr itu separuh dari iman?lgy2 bulan niey,bulan puase..so must sbr bnyk2..Allah tgh buat promosi terhebat..semue tgh nk merebut peluang niey..so ape lgy,Su pun kene luh merebut..hehehe.dh,dh,dh..jgn sad2..be happy alwaes..

To Acap : Acap,kenape nk putuskn frenship dgn Su?! why i tk tau pasal niey?ape niey?nk break frenship semue..kalau i bley lupekn cinta i terhadap Andy dulu without breaking our frenship,why can't u?i knw it's hard..but sbr..u need time..i also need time to forget my love towards u..so kite due kene usaha same2..kite bina persahabatan yng baru..yang suci dan sempurna..lgy2 di bulan yang suci ini..we begin a new frenship on this month..and hopefully,kite semue akan mendpt keberkatan..Amiin..so,jgn nk merepek2 lgy ye?kite happy2..and please luhh,make me happy..jgn buat i sedih2 lgy..promise me u will do so?

- syahsyah ur love

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

9:43 PM

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT BULAN RAMADHAN SEMUE !

sorry if lately asyik tulis blog to him aje..as wat i say,i cant talk to him face-to-face..just don't knw why..kkay..today first day puase..i can't puase pasal this stupid red light..and i currently am sick..been vomiting alot since i came back from lpking yesterday..entah ehy..why i suddenly am sick..everytime i eat,the food will be thrown back out..even today morning..i went to skool..before tat i ate something..at skool,i feel like vomitting and collapsing..still,the same result..muntah2 kt skola..i almost faint at the skool toilet..so when my teacher suroh balek,i just agree..now i tgh tahan dari nk muntah..i knw i can't..but i have to try..my maid is cooking porridge for me and lil' sis coz due2 ngah saket..i'm trying to eat ltr..tgk kalau bley..smlm Taufik txted me..i called him back..tk tau sape..then talked2 ngn die..haha..aik,aik,aik..mcm ade ape2 je..tkdeluhh..just making new frens..kn bgos..hahaha..

this one goes to Acap : U,thnks for the msg this morning..really am glad tat u read my blog and understand wat i have to say..i am really glad tat u dh sedar..i am glad tat u till want to be frens with me..i pun syng u and tknk kehilangan u..as wat u say , i am ur one and only sister love..and u're always mine brother love..tapi kalau untk maafkn u , i btol2 mintak maaf..i just can't..my hati dh tertutup untk maafkn u..but insyallah soon..i tk tau bile..kalau u nk i maafkn u cpt2,then why not u cube bukakn pintu hati i untk maafkn u..mungkin kalau u cube,i akan maafkn u?so cube je kay..and,kalau i nk minta satu bende dari u bleyy?kalau bley,i tetap nk pakai baju raye sepasang dgn u..as a symbol of our new frenship..bley??kalau tk bley tkpe..i'm okay with it..u knw wat to do kn after reading this?just txt me..i'll be waiting..

kkay luh..tats all i have..bye !

-syahsyah ur love

p/s : A beginning of a new frenship !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

2:22 PM

i am missing u..but my heart keeps on saying tat i hate u..i dnt knw why luh..i just can't stop thinking wat had happened..i am missing the moments we used to have last time..before all of this strted..before ur feelings towards me changed..but all i realised now is tat,it's impossible for me to have tat now..it's too late..i'm too late for ur love..i knw tat feelings will change sooner or later..but mine?it can nvr change..i just don't knw why..i still am waiting for something..i knw there is still something u wanna say to me..but u just can't..i can be ur fren but i can nvr forgive u..right now,in my heart,the doors for forgiving u are still closed..closed tightly..i am not sure in future..i want us to be like we use to be..still cn joke around and smile..if u didn't make the wrong choice,i guessed this won't happened..we will be like we used to be..u and me laughing and disturbing each other..i want tat moment back..can u give it back to me?please?even if we are frens?mungkin i tkkn hidup lame..we don't knw about this stuffs..now,i am in pain..my heart and the rest of y body..i can't breathe,i can't think,i can't see,i can't hear and i can't feel..why?i just don't knw..just now,i was expecting an answer from u..but there are no answers from u..the answers tat only u knw..no one elso knws..when i walked away,i was expecting u to stop me or o call or msg me..but no..there's only silence..nothing much..i cried at the staircase..i cried real bad..when u leave,then i came down..i am really disappointed in wat i've see..Acap,walaupun tkde pun sikit perasaan u terhadap i,i nk u pk pasal i..kite dh nk masuk 7 bulan "bersame"..i tk penah lupe..i maseh ingt date die lgy..the beautiful date and moment..i btol2 harap yng u bley sekurang2nye syngkn i..i tk mintak u untk cinta kn i..tpi syng,please?biar i cintakn u..but i akan tepis kn perasaan itu biler u dh syng kn i..i tau u nk jdi single..u love ur single life..u want to be frens only with me..kay,i'm fine with it..tpi tetap,i tk bley maafkn u..i'm just sooo sorry..i can't now..i don't knw about the future..please Acap , call me or msg me..i am waiting for ur answers and our relationship..let' strt anew..we built a new frenship..but with one condition,u tell me how u feel towards me and ur answers..i was hoping a "SORRY" from u since yesterday..but no..i am jut sad but i will be waiting..not to be in love with u..but to be ur fren..ur new fren..

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

9:16 PM

i knw wat i've said are rude..but u have to understand my situation nw..all this happened to fast..it's hard for me to accept it..but in the end i did..i am just telling u wat i feel..it's impossible for me to tell u in front of ur face..i'm sure something will happened..i knw u're trying to prove to me tat u're really wrong and sorry..by letting me listen to the song "DEMI WAKTU"..but i'm sorry..i just can't..the pain is tooo deep now..it's different..i wish u could understand..SUMPAH tkde niat i nk buat u mrh or wat..but i just nk u sedar tat u're changing..i love u and tats why i am trying to help u..i am trying for ur own good..not mine..i'm okay with u loving her..but not forever..u must accept the fact..eventhough drng ckp , 'mataey bley break , tunang bleyy putus , kahwin bleyy cerai' , but in fact no..when they're soo in love,we as their frens give them the encouragement..i just want u to let go of ur love..i knw it's hard..but trust me..u cn..u just need time..i am trying to do tat..i really do love u..tapi hakikatnye,cinta i hanya bertepuk sebelah tgn..i bkn pilihan u skrng..i tk leyy buat ape2 coz i knw tat i can nvr force anyone to love me or wat..but wat i cn do is advice u..its all up to u..kalau u nk dgr ape yng i ckp atau tak..but wat i am doing now is just telling u how i feel..it's useless telling u about my feelings towards u..i will try to forget my love towards u like how i forget my love towards Andy..i akan cube kalau itu yng u nk..walaupun it's hard for me,but i will try..time is all i need..it's really impossible for me to forget my love..i don't knw why..but u're just one special guy..u're special in every ways..i can't say in wat ways..but yes,u certainly are..i feel like going to u and strt anew...strt a new frenship..but i can't..i just dnt knw why..my heart is fully with u and about u...as wat i said,i cinta mati dgn u...but i kene lupekn cinta itu..tell me how?tell me how to forget my love toward someone special like u?please...i'm begging u nw..just tell me how..if tats wat u want,i will do it..for our own good..but i just tknk u maseh kejar2 cinta u yng sememangnye dh mati..cume u je yng tk sedar..bkn i nk batu api ke ape..but it's the truth..i am saying this bcoz i love u..hope u will understand..just give me time and tell me how to forget my love towards u..my special idol to my heart..tats all i need from u..

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

2:29 PM

seriously i really had enough..i've been standing this up for too long..now i just can't stand it anymore..i knw u still love her and only her is in ur heart..i am so stupid to be with u again while i knw tat it will hurt me so badly...u wanna knw why?this is because i love u soo much..but wat do u care..u feel urself so popular...u just dont think about my feelings...for u this means nothing..i really have sacrifice alot for u..i changed myself to lead a new life with u..but it seems tat its useless..tooo useless..u think by hiding all those msgs,i will nvr knw?sorry uhss ! i can get to knw everything by myself..like how i knw u still love her and be with me bcoz of her..serious..i feel like slapping ur face just now...but no..i just let u off..thnks to Andy and Ari luhh i can still sbr..u pk prangai u yng baru niey semue suke?sorry to say this but,u can just go and die if ur prangai mcm niey..u serious dh berubah since u love her..u berubah into the ACAP tat we all dont knw..the ACAP tat we all hate nw..u sanggup lukakn hati brother pasal pmpn..u sanggup gadoh senyap2 pasal pmpn..and u sanggup saketkn hati pmpn yng CINTA MATI dgn u just bcoz of ur ego...ego u yng penting kn diri sendiri..let me say this,she doesnt love u anymore luhh...she loves Yan..ur brother love...and yet u're still chasing her love..serious talking,u're just wasting ur time..kejar cinta yng bertepuk sebelah tgn..ouh please luhh! orng kalau bley tknk die terluka...but then he still heck care...u penah tk pk pasal perasaan i?even u tk cinta kn i but still u penah tk pk?sekurang2nye pk luhh..jgn nk buat bodoh je..and lgy satu,u niey memang suke sgt tipu and saketkn hati i kn?best ke saketkn hati i?i pun nk tau jgk..maneluh tau i pun bley try2..i tgk u buat niey semue mcm best gytu..mcm,"BESTNYE tgk syah saket hati ! "...ehy,please ehyy..be a MAN..jgn ikotkn EGO u..pasal EGO u tu,u just hurt me..the girl whom u used to love and waited for..jujur i kate,i am so madly in love with u even when we broke up and i was with Aziq..but then after all this happened,i suddenly feel tat its useless..just USELESS ! no one can wake u up..no one..only u cn wake urself up...sampai bile u nk kejar cinta tu?sampai bile?sedarlah sikit,die dh ade cinta yng baru..and sumpah,if u kacau r/s dorng,i tkkn bgy chance kt u..kalau u btol2 cintakn die,u sanggup lpskn cinta u just to see her happy with ur own brother love..niey tk..u still nk rampas cinta die dari Yan..ape nieyy?serious luh,breaking up with u today was the best choice ever..kalau tk,lps niey tk tau plak ape u nk buat..this is wat u want right?then be happy..u've got it and FYI,i seriously maseh tk puas hati dgn u lgy..we still got things to settle...jgn nk happy2 sgt..so i just wanna say CONGRATULATION for being the first guy ever to hurt me this MUCH ! TANIAH sgt2..hadiah anda akan diberikan tidak lame lgy..so WANSUAYY !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

2:59 AM

hey..who's tat sexy girl? haha ! cute tk? tk kn..haha!

jut came back from karaoke-ing with Mummy Mai's family , Hasif Nitro's frens and my family ..had fun actually...lgy2 with Hasif Nitro geng..mcm badut2..when we ang lagu dangdut, semue gelek siooot ! haha..had a great day today...i wa actually abit moody as my ppaed dh bes..can't txt my Bby{L}..but i was expecting him to txt me..but he didn't..so disappointed...we end our karaoke-ing session at 11pm..then we went home straight..Hasif Nitro and geng were riding bikes...sooo fun sehy...but i can't join them as my mum was there...then mummy send Mummy Mai home..then i saw a few bdak2 kt bwh her blok..it was Danial Irfan and his geng..and i knw one of them..its Apai RX-Z...it's one of the guy who tumpang me on the 31 July..haha..then when i reached home,called Su..talk with her..then called Hasif Nitro..Apai RX-Z wa there too..he gave me his nu..he say , "kalau perlukan ride or something , just call me. " HAHAHA ! i just say okayy...haha...num die pun dh save..buat collection..haha..but i still akan setia pada satu okaay ? haha..after tat,called Izmeer as he misscalled me..after tat called Bby{L}..he was about to sleep..get to talk to him for a while...dpt jgk melpskn rindu kt die..miss him sooo much sehyy...

kay luh..gtg...nk tido..tmrw Su nk serbu my hse pagy2 lgy..haha ! kkay..BYE2 !

-syahsyah ur minaahrep

p/s : Tiada duanya !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

12:29 AM

hey...sorry for not updating ye?haha..buzy luhh knn...

btw, wanna wish Hin a Happy 15th Bday ! to Hin : dh bsr dh niey anak..haha..happy bday ye?happy2 slalu ! and,get well soon..

now i wanna congratulate Su and Yan sebab std senyap2...thnks ehyy korng...haha ! but last long ye..hope korng kekal sampai ke jinjang pelamin..and,and,and , i wanna be ur pengapit taww ! hahaha...

hmmm...it seems tat everyone is happy..except for me..why?entah..my heart told me tat something's not right somewhere..sumpahh i don't knw wat...been searching for the answer..every single day and night..but still,no answer could be found..hmmm....

as for my relationship with Acap Hubby , i am really happy with him..i love him..cinta mati babe...i can't live without him...bhy,jujur i kate,i tkley berpisah dari u..u luh nyawa i bhy..i akan cinta u buat slamanye bhy...I LOVE U !

-syahsyah ur minaahrep

p/s : Cinta mati dgn u !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

7:42 PM

~01/08/10~

hey...see tat pic and date?yea..i get back with him yesterday...i still can't forgive him fully..sorry bhy..but it's the truth..Su wa the one who talked to me and Acap..and i listen to her and i tried to give him a chance..when Acap came to me and asked me if i want to patch with him , i jut kept silence...he promised me tat he won't do it anymore and he is really sorry..i don't knw if i can trust him..all i knw is tat i'm trying and he is probably trying to...i knw tat he still loves her..and maybe he patch with me pun kerana terpakse..entahlah..lets see..all i hope for now is tat i cld last with him and i want him to prove me wrong..i will try to forgive u and trust u again bhy..i've accepted u again..i am giving u one last chance to prove to me something..please remember bhy , i'll always love u and i want the best in us..let's stay together as long as we can..just remember bhy,i will always love u dear !

-syahsyah ur minaahrep

p/s : I'm trying my best !

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

8:11 PM

hey guys..do i look diff in this pic?haha..thnk to kak Jun for the make-over luh..just for yesterday..i get to learn some make-up tips luh..but now my eyes tgh soring..maybe bcoz of the fake eyelashes kot..ISHHHKKKK...now tgh tunggu my tution teacher dtng..so plan to update blog jap..

just now i go to madrasah..i even get to express my feelings to ustazah..i was lucky tat she can help me eventhough it's about my love and heart...wat she say is true..i shld forgive him but not forgive wat he had done to me..Ustazah also say tat guys are always like this..but we can't blame them as it's their natural beahavior..i believe in wat she says..as she is the only person i cn true advice from..she is like my kakak alrdy..she helped me alot..she even share with me some of the religious stuffs...she said tat NABI MUHAMMAD S.A.W once said " if we really like/love tat person , in future tat person will be the person we hate . But if we really hate tat person , in future we will be madly in love or madly like tat person . " so she said tat we mut not hate the person..we must hate the doings of the person..thnks Ustazah..u really make me realised something..

But now , shld i forgive him?i am really hurt..i want to forgive him,but i just can't..i don't want o hate him..but i just can't..how?i am really confused...i can't stop crying in the inside thinking about the reality...but i must accept reality..hmmm...i think i shld give myself time..time to think...

-syahsyah ur minaaahrep

{Syahsyah Bonch'Bonch ♥}

4:04 PM